May 13, The April 20

“April 20, 201x.

I will forgive you once I get over my anger. You talked with him for more than an hour, and that too at midnight. You picked a time that you thought was convenient for the both of you. Midnight! I talked sex with you when we were courting, at midnight. What do a man and woman have so much to talk at such a late hour?” He furiously threw the pen down, which shattered into four pieces. He wanted to crumple the notebook, but he wanted to remember things for later. Her smiles were deceiving. It was easy to fall in love with her when she smiled.

They were the thickest of friends. One was mellow. The other, not so much.

That’s the thing about sincere humans. They can’t make everyone happy. Some always lose.

“Are you two gays? Do you love him?”.

He wanted to break her skull. He knew better. He learnt self restraint in kindergarten. He wouldn’t allow anyone test his patience. That was a first. The promise he had made to her mother often allowed him to forgive her for her merciless words. She was full of those.

He wasn’t engineered to be affectionate. It took lots of patience, silence, unconditional love to enter his heart. Two people had already clawed their ways into it. It made her chance less. He remained silent when she blasted. He grinned when she cried. He crushed bottles when she slammed doors. With lots of smiles and extra kind words she thought she fooled everyone. He died within him.

He had always wanted a family. The perfect wife who would give him two children. His mother instilled the desire. The woman who woke up before everyone. Who lit the first lamp. Who a adjusted the curtains. Who made the best teas. Who packed the best lunches — 2 curries and thorans every day. Who was proud of her family and showed it. He had wanted one such partner. Obedient, kind, quiet, intelligent. When she giggled behind her Icecreams, when she sat between her parents, when he saw her paintings, he hadn’t realised he was entering trouble. He was the first and last person to see her through and beyond her deceptive smiles.